Dungeons And Dragons (2000)
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There are some movie concepts that seem so unlikely to produce successful results that it’s easy to wonder why producers bothered. A conversion of a popular role-playing game into a big-budget special-effects heavy movie doesn’t seem a likely candidate for a movie classic but the end result of this project is a movie that ends up being even worse than the premise suggests.
Looking at this movie it seems that virtually every time a production decision was required the worst possible decision was made. There have been literally hundreds of Dungeons & Dragons inspired books written over the years and while none of them are likely to attain the status of high literature there have been a few books written that could be converted into a decent movie. There's even a 1980's Children's TV series that might have provided some half-decent inspiration. Unfortunately, the producers decided against this and wrote a script from scratch which makes a valiant attempt to include every single fantasy cliche possible.
The film’s heroes are a couple of thieves, who despite their larcenous ways are actually nice people, who have to set off on a typical fantasy quest to retrieve a magical artifact capable of defeating the Evil magician Profion (played by Jeremy Irons) who is plotting to take over the world. Naturally their journey will involve picking up a motley group of companions including a dwarf, an elven warrioress and an idealistic female mage. Together they must face monsters randomly plucked from the role-playing game manuals and assorted magical dangers including a deadly – but disappointingly crystal-free - maze presided over by Richard O’Brien.
The plot isn’t really worth dwelling on, except to note that certain key scenes were removed from the film and only appear as deleted scenes on the DVD, as a result of which the film doesn’t entirely make sense.
Instead of hiring decent actors for the main roles, a group of unknowns have been hired, and judging from the standards of their performances they are likely to remain unknown. There has been an attempt to increase the quality of the acting by hiring Oscar winner Jeremy Irons who delivers what must be one of history’s most ludicrously over-the-top Evil Overlord performances - which is at least entertainingly hammy. Thora Birch is also here, playing the Empress who Irons is trying to depose, but despite good performances in the likes of “American Beauty”, here she is content to do an impression of Natalie Portmann’s role in “The Phantom Menace”.
The script doesn’t seem to even attempt to be a good script for a fantasy epic, instead concentrating on putting is as many one-liners and supposedly comic situations as the scriptwriters can fit in. Admittedly, there are very occasional moments when it’s actually funny but not nearly enough to make this film work as a comedy.
In contrast to the ineptness elsewhere, the special effects are actually quite good and the inevitable hordes of dragons look reasonably impressive but that’s not enough to save this film from the pits of mediocrity.
In summary, this is a disastrous attempt at making a fantasy epic, although it is so bad at times it qualifies as Amusingly Bad and some entertainment can be got from this. Unless you want to laugh *at* a film rather than *with* it, avoid this.
Rating : 4 / 10
DVD Review (Region 2)
Strangely, the multiple deleted scenes on the DVD are better than many of the scenes in the films, and fill in a couple of plot holes - so their exclusion is a bit baffling. Elsewhere there are a few featurettes in which everyone involved seems to have the lamentable impression that they were making a good movie.
DVD Rating : 7 / 10
All content ©2003 William Marnoch.
Comments? Agree/Disagree with the Reviews? Suggestions? Random Ramblings? Whatever you might want to say, feel free to e-mail me at william@wmarnoch.freeserve.co.uk .